One of the main reasons why conservatism has been losing ground is the fact that we are way too focused on "rationally debating" the issues that cause division. This leads to us engaging in pointless discussions that benefit no one, convince no one, and are time and energy-consuming. Meanwhile, the left attacks everyone that doesn't follow their dangerous ideology, completely disregarding any shred of logic and rational thought. Our obsession with engaging in rational discussion is precisely why we are losing.
I am sure that something along these lines has happened to you: you try to explain to your friends, family, girlfriend, or whoever the reasons why your point of view is valid and good, and why theirs is dangerous and wrong. For me, these controversial discussions used to be mostly about biological differences between men and women, politics, and religion. And I used to get angry, because the people that I was debating didn't even try to understan, so the discussion was not a fruitful one, but rather a dick-measuring contest. Useless, expensive and unrewarding. Sure, sometimes it is wise to rationally discuss a specific topic, and try to find middle ground with the person that you're talking to. But considering the current state of affairs, chances are that the people that you debate have absolutely no interest in understanding you, and are rather waiting for you to slip up so they can scream bigotry. Which is why we have to understand the limitations of rational debate and stop engaging in pointless discussions.
Chances are that the people that you debate have absolutely no interest in understanding you, and are rather waiting for you to slip up so they can scream bigotry.
People are not rational
Every widespread theory of economics ignores one fundamental aspect of human nature: people are not rational. Not even close. And here we are, thinking that if we explain our arguments convincingly enough and support them with enough evidence, people will eventually understand and change their minds. That will not happen. What will happen is that you and your interlocutor will end up angry, tired, and even more divided than before. That's just the way us humans are. Which is why you need to become proficient in recognizing when a discussion will probably be fruitful and enjoyable, and when it won't. Learn to read people, but remember that everyone is guided mostly by emotions.
The point of debating sensitive issues with people is usually to find some common ground, or to convince the other person that you're in the right and they are not. That's nice in theory, but in practice things are quite different. Even if people were rational (which they aren't), there are some ideologies and subjects in which you and whoever you're talking to will disagree so strongly that any attempt at finding common ground will be absolutely futile. For example, I have no interest in trying to convince someone so evil and so brainwashed that they believe that it is ok to allow and promote gender transitioning in children. I don't care about their point of view, I am one hundred percent sure that they are wrong and I am right, and I also know that they are so deeply controlled by their perverse ideology that there is nothing that I could say to convince them to switch sides. Hell, maybe I don't even want them to. There is no point in talking to people that are so evidently wrong and so convinced that they are right. Don't waste your time.
However, there are people that are actually interested in understanding your point of view, and with those people you can have a healthy discussion. Simply recognize who you're talking to.
Some will call this extremism. Maybe it is. But it is not wrong to be extremely on the side of God, on the side of family, on the side of beauty, on the side of all that's good and Holy.
You don't win by talking
The other thing that tends to happen to conservatives is that because we know that we are on the side of God and truth, we become comfortable in this knowledge and stop trying to win. We smuggly point out the glaringly obvious inconsistencies in leftist ideology, and think that that's enough for our side to win. It's not. Because people are not rational. They don't care that their arguments make no sense. All they care about is virtue signaling and shutting down everyone who disagrees. And we laugh it off and think that eventually, the truth will prevail. It very well may, but only if we start acting. What I mean by that is that conservatives have endured the attacks of the left and "turned the other cheek" for too long. Haven't we realized that being rational and correct will do absolutely nothing to swing the pendulum to our side? Haven't we realized that the west is dying, and that it will die tragically unless we stop being so obsessed with arguments and logic and start rejecting every single aspect of the ideology that has been poisoning our way of life?
Some will call this extremism. Maybe it is. But it is not wrong to be extremely on the side of God, on the side of family, on the side of beauty, on the side of all that's good and Holy. Besides, we all know how extreme the other side is.
The point is this: don't waste any more time and energy trying to sway everyone to your side by debating rationally. That's what we've been trying to do for decades, and that's exactly why we've lost so much ground. That's precisely why now we are even having to discuss if giving estrogen to children is right or wrong. Rational debate is limited by both parties' interest in finding common ground. The only way to start regaining some ground on the side of good is to be absolutely convinced that we are correct, and to not give any more leeway for degenerate politicians to pass legislations and laws that only cater to the loudest, most violent mobs.
Start leading by example, and show yourself confident and determined in the notions that you know are good and loudly act on them! Let's save our way of life.