The mindset of a man, understood as the general mental outlook he has towards life, is, if you ask me, his greatest ally, or his biggest enemy. The thoughts that fill your mind are the ones that determine how you react to situations, how you handle difficult times, they determine the steps you take daily, the habits you have, and thus the results that you get.
It is critically important that a man identifies and strongly seeks to possess a mindset that propels him forward, instead of one corrupted by victimhood and lack of accountability, which does nothing but guarantee he is held back.
I have thought long and hard about what mindset a man ought to have if he is to give himself the best possible chance of achieving the goals he has set for himself, and although I’ll admit, as flawed and human as I am, I am not in possession of the absolute truth, I have come to the conclusion that a mindset best described as relentless, excessively confident yet humble, and laser focused is the key. Allow me to elaborate on each of those aspects.
"What it comes down to is intense desire. To get this winning edge, you need to build an indomitable will. This means you must be relentless; you must never give up." -Anson Dorrance
I have written multiple posts about the part that failure plays in a man's life. The point here is that life is hard. Life is a constant challenge. I haven't found any way of denying this. Even if you live a life of blessings, life will get hard at some point. It's the natural state of things. Failure to realize this fact leads to many men quitting when things don't come easily.
Good things don't ever come easily. Get that ingrained into your mind. You don't want to believe the opposite, trust me. I did when I was younger, and all it did was render me impatient, and incapable of putting in the work, always looking for the ultimate "hack" that would make all my desires manifest before me, effortlessly.
Good things come to those that relentlessly pursue them. Those that refuse to stay down. Those that are stubborn in the best sense of the word, and those that will not be led astray by vices, temptations, failures, or anything else.
EXCESSIVELY CONFIDENT YET HUMBLE
A follower recently messaged me in response to one of my stories (see below), posing the question: “Is this not pride? How do you reconcile this with a virtuous life?”
It’s a valid question to ask, but I believe it misunderstands what confidence actually is. Confidence is not the belief that one is better than his fellow men, nor is it arrogance and a lack of vision or openness about potentially being wrong. On the contrary, the excessive confidence that I call for is one based on the fact that you are able and open to learn, pivot, and adjust according to new information. I am excessively confident that I will reach my goals because I know, no matter what happens, I will keep trying, changing my ways, if need be, all the while being accompanied by God and His infinite wisdom. How could it be possible to fail under such circumstances?
Notice how different this is from pride: I know I don’t have all the answers. I know I am flawed and a sinner. I know my ways are not perfect and never will be. But I am confident because I know God is with me, and I know I’m working as hard as I can and as smartly as I can, with a clear and noble goal in mind. And I know I will never stop trying.
Confidence is the name of the game. Confidence, true confidence, requires humility. Pride allows for no improvement, no criticism, no submission to God’s will.
Be extremely confident, yet humble.
If a man does not know where he is going, any road takes him there. This means, if you don't have a clear vision of the life you're trying to build, you'll wander aimlessly, running around in circles hoping for salvation.
You need to know what you're aiming at. Otherwise all you're doing is letting life lead you wherever it seems right at the moment. This sounds good from a utopian, hippie perspective where the goal of life is to "enjoy the moment", but do that for a few years and see what happens. It's not cool nor purposeful to be lost because you spent your best years "living in the moment".
You need direction. You need a road that you can take. You need an ideal to strive towards. Otherwise, how will you ever know the actions that you need to take? Once you define where you want to arrive, start organizing your life and aim at that ideal with all your might.
It is the way of the world that one usually ends up getting what one is searching for.
To fix your mindset, start here. And tell me later if your life doesn't get a thousand times better.
Subscribe and get a free Ebook HERE!
Check out my ebooks:
Follow me and support the page: